kaleidoscope

As 10th of August passed us every year… and as this date meets us again this year as it supposed, it was me who suddenly turn 25th. Gosh, I’m one year older now!

Hmm…

Till date here is the list of family, friends and relatives which had greeted me so far via various mediums :-
a)    Abang
b)    Aimi
c)    Ana
d)    Asraf
e)    Ayah
f)    Ayei
g)    Cikgu Latifah
h)    Dzul
i)    Huda
j)    Kak Ija
k)    Kak Nyah
l)    Mak
m)    Meiche
n)    Umi
o)    Nurul
p)    Normah
q)    Office colleague/team members (Boss Junaid, Hashim Khan, Juanito, Aaron, Hui San, Alalasundram, Waqas, Farukkh, Shahbaz, Ivy, Eng Chuan, Tee Kong, Cheu Seng, Steven, Muhammad Ali, Chee Meng, Gabriel, Kelvin and 2 more new team members which I didn’t know their name yet)
r)    Pnadz
s)    Puma
t)    Riza
u)    Shatira
v)    ex-SMKTTian and Fariz (BK, Syikin, Riza, Nurul Fadzilah, Adi, Khalil, Adan, Hasrul, Arif, Amir, Hazli, Siti)
w)    Yanie
x)    Zati
y)    Sorry if I ever missed your name!

Interestingly, this year… my birthday had been celebrated three times (so far :P). The first one was while me attending exSMKTT reunion at PD, N9. My fiancée, Umi had setup a surprise party for me which I had never expected at all (it was earlier than the suppose date, how can I expect that kan?) during the barbecue time. I got a secret recipe cake (chocolate indulgence), candles to be blown, a song that sang by my fellow exSMKTTians, a card and a present from her. Appreciate so much my dear.  Thanks

The second one was at ISCM. Despite Hashim said, “Go to the pantry, we have a meeting there”, this one certainly can be predicted since Ivy had monitor all of the team members birthday, and make sure that it will be celebrated by us all when the time come. Beside, who conduct meeting in pantry maaa? Gosh.. It’s expected lorr.. The unexpected thing is, that actually my project manager@boss, Junaid had share the same birthday with me which is 10 August. He is 29 (guess what, he became project manager at 28! What an achievement!) now, and me… I’m 24. Eh… 25. Hehe… So two more cakes to go… (mango and coffee; secret recipe cakes again!)

The third one was by my mother. A chocolate cake! It might not be as expensive as those cakes in two celebrations above (which both were secret recipe’s cakes!), but still, a cake and a celebration given by a mom, it’s for sure the most special one rite? Thanks to my only and dearest mom. Appreciate it very much!

So what’s with these birthday celebration? What’s with this ruckus for festivity and all? For what reasons really? Isn’t it just another day (date) which will occur every year? You even become older on that day (for me, that’s a bit sad) rite?

Some may say, it was the day you become one year older, where you become more mature, and your burden of responsibility growth even greater. And I started to feel that already. I’m very much aware that numbers of responsibilities waiting me ahead. It is also in a way, reminder for me as a Muslim, that I’m closer to “my end” as each seconds passed me… and for Him that I will come back to.. someday…

… … … … … … …

But as for now, I am absolute happy that as a common person and just an average homo sapient, my birthday was remembered! Being celebrated in numbers of occasions were bonuses to me. Thanks to all of you! And grateful to Allah who gave me all of these joyous and happiness. Alhamdulillah… - 20th August 2008

Each person is a born leader. That’s what Allah Ta’ala said as in Quran mean something like this, “Setiap manusia adalah khalifah di atas muka bumi ini dan akan di tanya tentang kekhalifahannya”.

So it’s me. It’s you. It’s everyone. But depend on each person; our scales of “khalifah” are differs. Some with such enormous and great amount of responsibility; leader of a country, a clan maybe… while lots with just tiny weight on their shoulder which is to take care of himself but nonetheless is as well important (at least for him or herself).

For now, some of us might hold responsibility as boss, or maybe lead of a project, or even a small non-registered organization. If not now, we might as well someday right? Who knows?

So… Let see, if you are given a task to lead a group of people, what kind of leader you would like to be? If you are given these 3 choices above, which one you would like to emulate the most?

1. Is it a slow, flip-flop, lead that unable to speak, lead that lies, lead that care more of his cronies and families rather than the people?

2. Is it a morale-question kind of leader (hey, this thing in the first place brought up by so called Islamic party ok? Ask old people, they know!), willing to even workout with his very enemy just for the purpose of gaining power? Do what ever necessary even the nastiest way just in order to achieve his individual goal?

3. Or is it a calm, sometimes cynical but visionary and patriotic enough for his religion, race and nation… old kind of fashion man that sometimes do wrong things but in ethical still with the correct objective?

Or you want to mirror yourself with our beloved prophet, Rasulullah saw instead?

Number one and two, certainly not my choice. Don’t know about you though. As for Rasulullah, who don’t want to consider him as role model? Me? Of course he is the best role model ever. But to emulate a “Maksum” prophet in exact… who are we, a normal person day dreaming about? We can and we should try, but to emulate accurately, it’s unlikely achievable.

What about number 3? For me he is great, the best leader for the country so far in history of the nation. Screw you if you want to feel otherwise, but I believe he is the best so far. In fact, I don’t think there will be other personalities that able surpass him, at least in this period. As wise man said, “Great leader only come once per era”. As a great politician he is, he never fails to overcome challenge from his opponent; neglect the actuality on how he overcame it. Never done a too wrong and unnecessary steps in his political career. For me, he also is a fighter and a living legend that prove he always win; despite whatever people thought were, whether he’s right or wrong.

Again… To be a great leader as number 3 candidate is, it’s too unbelievable.

So what kind of leader will I or had I be?

I wonder… … …

Of course you… who know me well, can answer that from your own perspective.

As for my own judgment on myself, I believe I have good heart (I believe so), do thing whole-heartedly with sincere, though I am the kind who take few steps lightly which lead to wrong doing (sometimes). In political world (in Malaysia of course), once you took a wrong step, then next day you are “thrown” to the bottom level. But since I’m not (yet) in that kind of world, I wish I can be a leader that learn from mistake, can admit his wrongness, continue to be strong, and try the best for the very best; including not to make similar mistake over and over again and most of all; responsible for his own action. - 12th August 2008

engagement 1st June

so everything went well. syukur ke hadrat Allah Ta’ala.

a friend asked me how I feel now, in fact I’d bein ask the same question even before the engagement. My answer is the same.

Happy? Of course lah! But… my feelin’ is more to hope. Hoping that everythin’ will go well, and He will provide the best end result for us.. for the people I love…

I’m still and always pray for that…

darin aleeya

she’s cute. cute. and cute. and she’s my niece, miss darin aleeya binti faeizal fareez.
FYI, this is actually my first niece.

I don’t know. In fact, I’m not really sure… but its really a different feelin’ that I experienced when I first saw her.

I was amazed? erm.. not really.. it’s more like “teruja”. and luv, definitely.

Maybe this is the sensation of havin’ niece with blood relation? Humm.. God knows!

p/s : so what’s the feelin then to have ur own baby?… Hmmm… (*wondering)

yeap.. sad but true maybe? or pathetic? this blog will reach her 2nd birthday this coming november but somehow I only managed to wrote thirteen posts so far. Hmm… it proved how I had become more and more less enthusiasm to write which caused by busy-ness (or laziness?!). Anyhow, with this recent post that you are reading right now, the number of posts had officially turns to 14.

hari ni
balik awal. baru 4.30 petang da cabut.

today… no work, in
fact… I’ll be out of office for the whole week. for
those who had sent email
to my Standard Chartered email account… expect to get my
reply next week If it
important for me to reply ASAP, forward
it to my private email or give me a call la… (jangan kedekut!). I currently
attending Java training with farukkh, aszifa, tee kong and christine
from Monday to Friday. So at 1630 today, AEY2595 already "screaming"
(ceh macam la motor "superbike") on Federal Highway, headed
back to Puchong, which apparently part of Sepang parliamentary area.

FYI, Sepang is an area popular with the famous F1 track, a
great KL international airport and now we will be having new landmark called
LADANG KH$%#@R MODEN+MEGA. Haha… this might be quite a "basi"
issue by now, but honestly, I followed the case quite closely and I would like to share my
thought with you on this matter. Wanna hear it? Ok. One side claimed "he’s the
one that starting it, it’s not my fault", while the other party
defends by saying "we had yet to fully agree on the project".
The fanaticism of
both parts… to continue defending their groups stand (sometimes bluntly)
until at some degree, I think people already lost the "main point" :)) Which is, "people (especially
Malay) in that area who had suffer from the fact that the area had
been the area of "ladang kh&^%$r" for years, but the
last fine solution is… it’s still going to be one".
I don’t think the Malays (forget political and religious matter for a
while, let focus on Malay "sensitivity" for a while) will
be "very happy" and "very please" with the fact
that their area will still known as "kawasan penternakan
k&^%$#r" whether
it’s mega or not, whether it stinky or not! Ok. Let have some simple examples as below :-

Before:
"Eh
Husin, busuk la area kampung ko ni.. kawasan ladang **** tu bau teruk
sngt.. macamana pengurusannya ni.. ish..ish…", kata Majid
sambil tersengih-sengih.

After:
"Waaa…
dah maju yer ladang **** kampung ko, Sin… Moden dan mega pulak tu..
huwaa…", kata Majid sambil tersengih-sengih.

See?
Haha… If you’re smiling
right now, I think you got my point I very much don’t think Husin
will feel proud wutsoever, whether it’s
mega or not, whether it stinky or not… the main fact it
is still there. So
my argument is, why don’t u guys move it elsewhere??
Haihh (*sigh…)

Ok, enough with that. This supposes to be a
blog full with love, not to spread hatred, cultivating anger or anything. So lets
get back to the real "tajuk"

For those who didn’t
know, here are some facts
about me in recent and past few months :-

a) I’d moved out from zilun to
motorola. my motive is –> to find a better job, a better pay. and
yeap… I got one. but after a while, I started to think that I’m not
really fit there. I don’t really think I’m the kind of person that
can tolerate that my c++ code, fail or did not work after
12.5 hours of compilation! motorola style emphasizes on "Doing It Right at
First Time", but apparently I’m the kind of guy who learns by
"Trial and Error". so, it had worsens the situation. then
scope comes into picture. So here I am today, feeling somehow that
"the shoes really fit well this time"! in fact I’d
already finished
one of the projects.. the SMS Banking project. Alhamdulillah, thanks to
Allah

b) in my current new team, again… (as
in motorola) I’m the single 
Malay. majorities
are chinese, and
pakistanis. 3 philiphines, an Indians and a Malay; which is
as explained –> me. hmmm… but everyone was
nice.. so it’s
great

c) i’ve yet to really get "friend"
in scope that I use to have my lunch alone. (it’s differ from
motorola of course )

d) next month, 1st of June  –>
I will "menunang anak dara orang". (i refuse to use the word "meminang".. x best)

e) hmm…i’m
getting more and more interested in "malaysian politic"
lately… newspapers, blogs and malay yahoogroups… anything related to political matter is what I "digested"
everyday from those sources…

f) I suppose to go for a "Malay related" dialogue
today, but due to few circumstances… was not able to attend it… 

g) I miss her so so so much…

h) AEQ681 had involved in quite a tragic accident. The driver (of course me lah) was totally fine, but AEQ681 had severely injured. There’s no way for her to recover to her best condition anymore. So its time for her to go (tata.. :P) and I got a new car (2nd hand je.. and old model lorrr…) Satria 1.3, WHP7974 which previously belong to my brother.. kire aku sambung bayor jer la… morales of the story :-
a) when its raining… drive your car as fast as you could
b) when you feel something wrong with your car, don’t give much of a care. xyah ler check2 sngt. check lebey kurang jer
c) jadilah manusia kedekut untuk berbelanja untuk keselamatan anda. tayar tu da agak2 botak ke idak, redah jer….
(as the conclusion, this tragedy had failed to neither fully alert me, nor that it gave me a "strong" lesson after all)

i) I’m bored
today, so I write a post for my blog

that’s
all for now… wassalam dan salam sejahtera…